23 Here’s a bit of an unorthodox request, but does anyone need a cute rebound girl right now? If so, yeet me a message.

Does anyone remember that prank video from a couple of years ago that went viral about this boy approaching girls at his university and asking them to be his rebound? And he found that one girl who was super sweet and actually agreed? Well this is kinda like that but there’s no hidden camera. Unless you’re into that.

We’ve all been there before, constantly checking our phones for messages from that previous partner, wondering if they’re hurting too. Wanting to vent to friends but you refrain from doing so because they’re probably sick of hearing about it. Let me be that soundboard to you. Let me build back up your self confidence for you.

But to begin, a little about me:

So in order to deviate from the verbal meanderings of how I love music, art, hiking, and nature (because who doesn’t?), I’ve devised a short list of the pros and cons of being my friend, entitled, *A Short List of the Pros and Cons of Being My Friend*. So without further ado and in no particular order:

Pro: not afraid of snakes.
Con: terrified of grasshoppers.

Con: dry sense of humor.
Pro: that’s the only thing dry about me.

Pro: hair to my waist - in the slow process of toning it silver
Con: hair to my waist - it’s constantly damp because I never blow dry it. This refers to my 2nd pro about dryness ya filthy animals.

Pro: loves trying new food.
Con: will try new food right off of your plate.

Pro: works in Microbiology/Mycology
Con: huge germaphobe

Pro: I’m 23.
Con: everyone hates you when you’re 23. Points if you recognized this reference. Hint: it’s not TSwift.

Pro: I’m 5’0”feet/ 151cm tall. Kind of a Hide and Seek champion.
Con: I’m 5’0”feet/151cm tall. Do not ask me to go grocery shopping for you unless you just want to be disappointed.

Pro: i’M eSsEnTiAl - so yay job stability.
Con: I won’t be able to talk as often but I’ll do my best.

Pro: Moms love me.
Con: Moms love me.

Pro: I really do like art though.
Con: too self conscious to post any of my own.

Pro: consider me as an emotionally intense care bear.
Con: I act tough but I’m really not. I will shed some thug tears on your behalf.

DISCLAIMER:
I can’t promise anything long term but I can promise you that you’ll get some great memes and nudes out of this.