Ontario/Online (Married) I Know I'm Kind of an Asshole.....

Here's why I know I'm kind of an asshole:

My wife and I have been drifting apart. She started drinking a lot and being really, really mean for no reason when drunk, so I started to feel distant towards her. We also are both former athletes, but she has completely stopped caring about her appearance, has gained a lot of weight (I mean a lot), and we just never have sex anymore. I don't even try anymore, and she only tries when she's drunk and being mean, so I turn her down. Also, to be completely honest, I just am not attracted to her anymore. Don't get me wrong, I'm not necessarily trying to leave her or anything... I wish she would get some help with her drinking, and I wish she would care about her appearance a little more.

I've talked to her about the drinking, but nothing changes. I can't talk to her about her appearance, because I don't know how to. Appearance is NOT everything, and I even do like a thick girl, but I think it is more an attitude thing with her that turns me off. She just simply does not care. It makes me feel like a complete asshole, but I miss the spark, the energy, the excitement of being attracted to someone, and that someone being equally attracted to me.

I'm looking for someone to talk to, get comfortable with, and ideally send some photos. They don't have to be super spicy and you don't have to show your face, but I will send photos of me and I'd love to find someone also willing to share. Just an ongoing conversation we have whenever we have time to message each other.

You will come to see that I am just a normal guy, funny at times, nice (despite the honesty about my wife here, which makes me feel terrible to even write).

I'm 39, 6'2", 190lbs with tattoos. Feel free to flame me for being an asshole too... I don't get offended and can handle honest feedback.

Hope to hear from you.