Wickedly wonderful chick iso someone to keep me on my toes

It's 2:37 in the morning, and I'm writing this as I sit in the back of an SUV, completely sleep-deprived. Forgive me if I ramble, am incoherent, and make typos. This is my life though *chuckles*

I think we've all hit a point in our lives where we think "Fuck, this can't be all, right? Right?!" Because hoo boy, I'm deep in that stage. Call it a mid-life crisis, or being greedy, or whatever label you want. I won't sit idly by as day after day slips by. Fuck all that noise.

I'm just an average 48 year old married chick, no kids by choice. Blonde, grey eyes, crooked smile, hidden tattoos, have a belly/thick/chubby/whatever you wanna call it. I know this will turn off some guys, but I'm not about to hide. I'm pretty funny & sarcastic as fuck. Self-deprecating. Kind hearted. Music is my first & true love, and I have earbuds in all the time (currently obsessed with Good Neighbours or listening to books on Audible). I like to cook, I try to bake, and I love to travel. Love to watch horror series/movies or anything related to astronomy/space. Played sports growing up, but now my jam is watching live hockey.

So, that's my vanilla side.

Here come the sprinkles.

I think I've got a healthy array of kinks and generally don't judge. I'm into D/s and am a total switch. I can be a very good girl, or bring you to your knees with you begging to be my fuck doll. I adore toys of all kinds. There's a lot more, and I'm not *just* into the bdsm scene. Feel free to ask.

I'm looking for someone who craves the vanilla with a very healthy dose of sprinkles. Someone relatively close to my age who can compartmentalize like a rock star. I don't play well with conservative men, so if you're some Trump simp, move on.Tired of hiding everything? Want a friend, a cheerleader, and a filthy muse? I may be the chick for you.

I'm completely real and don't want anything from you but time & fun. Pics in profile to give you an idea who I am.

Fuck M&Ms. My sprinkles are much more fun when they melt in your mouth.